A New Year
A chance to start fresh.
If you follow me on Instagram you know that I don’t really believe in resolutions. I don’t think you need a holiday to change your life. If it’s New Years Day or the middle of July, the day your perspective changes, you change.
With that being said I do find something invigorating about a new year. I try to carve out some time in those first few days to reflect on the year past and where my goals will take me in the future. I think goal setting is important for work, for life, and for self growth.
Each year my husband and I carry on a tradition we started many years ago. Before we were married a coworker suggested a new form of goal setting.
We write a letter to ourselves for the year ahead. One that we write on New Years Day to ourselves on New Years Day a year from now. The letter goes into our Christmas decorations box and when I start decorating the next year I keep it in a drawer until we open them on New Years Day. It can be as long or as short as we would like. In our letters we talk about the past year and all that we accomplished, exciting events, and even hard times. We talk about where we are right now. Our thoughts about personal growth, our family, where we would like to be as we sit and write our new letter a year from now.
Its so interesting to read our letters from the year before and to see how much has changed. Not only how our life has changed but also our perspective. Especially in the last few years, since our kids have been born, our letters focus a lot less on us and a lot more on them. As I sat a wrote the letter for myself to open next year I couldn’t help but notice that a majority of what I wanted for the year to come was to be a better mother for my girls.
I went out on a search to find any resource to help me become that mother. I don’t believe you need to be in a bad place to look for help. Maybe you want to empower yourself to do better and you just need guidance on which way to go or maybe you are struggling and you need someone to rejuvenate you and give you insight on what might help. Either way I think each and every one of us could use some encouragement, to help us become better parents or maybe to let us know we are actually doing better than we thought we were.
I feel so blessed to have met Courtney and Jenny of Confident Parent Coaching. Their name is extremely fitting because they want to do just that, help you become a confident parent. They provide you with the tools to help make your relationship with your kids stronger and your kids happier. We all know that parenting can have beautiful days and then those really dark days can creep in too. How nice would it be to have a support during those really hard times? Sometimes what we need is a fresh perspective, some new ideas and encouragement that we can be the parents we strive to be for our children. Courtney and Jenny can offer just that.
My husband and I scheduled a call with Confident Parent Coaching and we were extremely pleased with how easy it was to schedule and how accommodating they were. We scheduled an hour with them and the time flew by. They were full of practical ideas and easy ways to implement them. There wasn’t just generalizations, they gave REAL advice for current situations we were struggling with.
I had opened up to them about how dinner time was a real struggle for us. The girls not eating, just wanting to get up and play and then an hour later saying they were hungry. Jenny and Courtney suggested we use a timer to encourage them to stay seated. When the timer went off they could get up and do what they would like to do, but until then they had to stay seated and continue to eat their dinner. It sounds so simple but it really worked. My oldest really responded to this technique so I started to implement the timer into other parts of our day like getting dressed and picking up toys. I really think this helped her feel empowered as well, she focused less on what task mommy wanted her to do and more on what she could choose when the timer went off.
Our call was filled with so many great tips like this one. I really felt like they listened to our needs and tailored a plan specifically for us. At one point in the call Courtney said something that really struck a cord with me, “it seems like there is a lot of pressure on Diana”. This opened my eyes. It wasn’t pressure anyone else was putting on me but the pressure I was putting on myself. Since then I have really tried to let go more, to embrace the happy moments and realize that I am not perfect and I don’t expect my kids to be perfect as well.
Overall this call helped us realize that we are doing a great job. Yes we want to do better and have stronger relationships with our kids but overall we are doing just fine. During the call they said “Rules without relationship is rebellion” and I hope to repeat this to myself everyday. More than anything I want to build a strong bond with my children with love and respect. That doesn’t mean I am going to let them do whatever they want, we will have confident and clear rules, and I am going to focus on connecting with my kids and listening to them a whole lot more while I implement them.
Next New Years Day, when I open up my letter, I hope to see that I achieved all of my parenting goals. Most importantly I want to look back and see how these small changes, and a lot of love, made us all so much happier.
The Gray Ruby Diaries occasionally receives free products and payment to feature items on this site. I take a lot of pride in endorsing products I love and I hope you trust that I would never let that get in the way of sharing my personal opinions with you. Thank you again for reading and I hope by sharing my experiences you can take away little pieces to make your life easier and happier!